Gaining some Perspective
by Arasinyah
Summary: Dealing with the aftermath of Special Education, Rachel grows up a bit and tries an unbiased view only to realise things might be even worse than they seemed.
1. Chapter 1

**Post Special Education. Mind you I'm not good at keeping people in character so if you have a problem with those kinds of stories then I should suggest you stop now. This probably sucks and is too choppy and all.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.**

" I have a song that I'd like to sing."

A collective sigh went up in the choir room although Mr. Schue was just glad that Rachel wasn't giving up even more solos .A world in which Rachel Berry did not fight to be lead vocalist was one he had never foreseen and even though it was probably going to be another song dedicated to how much she loved and missed Finn, it was good to see her determined again.

"_Your fingertips across my skin  
The palm trees swaying in the wind, images  
You sang me Spanish lullabies  
The sweetest sadness in your eyes, clever trick_

Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy  
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Can't you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance  
My back is turned on you  
Should've known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street  
You took my hand and danced with me in the shade  
And when you left you kissed my lips  
You told me you would never ever forget these images, no

Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy  
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Can't you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance  
My back is turned on you  
Should've known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do

I cannot go to the ocean  
I cannot try the streets at night  
I cannot wake up in the morning  
Without you on my mind

So you're gone and I'm haunted  
And I bet you are just fine  
Did I make it that easy to walk  
Right in and out of my life?

Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Why can't you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance  
my back is turned on you  
should've known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do"

She took a deep breath and went back to her seat ignoring all the stares she was getting. She was well aware of the lovesick puppy look Finn was giving her along with the glares from the brunette who stole his virginity.

As the song faded away the Glee members stared at their captain. She always sang from her heart. No matter how much they hated her obsessive ways, her constant criticisms no one could deny that she only ever sang with the utmost belief in her words and if she meant what she was singing right now it was safe to say that Finchel was done with forever.

"Good job Rachel. You don't always sing like that though I can't help but wonder what brought on the change."

Rachel smiled albeit it was only a polite smile.

"I had a long talk with someone whose opinion I respect and having had an epiphany regarding my behaviour, I have decided to limit myself to only a professional presence in the Glee club."

"What does that mean?" Brittany whispered to Artie and Finn turned to listen to his reply since he was confused as well.

"I..." Confused himself, Artie stayed quiet while Santana voiced the question on everyone's mind.

"The hell does that mean Man-hands?" She kept her eyes focused on her nails not really interested in Rachel's reply.

"It means that you could be pregnant and I won't care." The hurt look from Quinn was overlooked as she ploughed on with her words. "It means that you could lose your voice and it won't bother me because again I just don't care. You can get kicked off the Cheerio's or that football team of ours and I won't care. I am here only to sing. Your personal lives do not matter to me. And I expect mine to not matter to you all either but considering that none of you have ever shared my work ethic that is going to be a stretch."

"You have a personal life? Yeah right!"

"Yes Mercedes thank you for proving my point."She rolled her eyes, the word idiots running through her mind as she took a seat.

"Okay then. Let's move on to this week's assignment. In light of the new developments your new assignment is to find a song that truly embodies something really personal for you. It could be about a relationship, about a person about an emotion, anything that really speaks to you and reinvent it to suit yourself."

Rachel raised her hand and Mr. Schue sighed expecting a protest.

"Yes Rachel."

"If it truly embodies something important to us then wouldn't re-inventing it to suit ourselves be redundant? Or do you mean to re-invent it as in to suit our style of singing better?"

"Either one is fine. So, anything else?"

"I'd like you to look for a replacement for me."

"Fothermucker!" Lauren said getting some candy out of her bag in lieu of popcorn and settled in for the show that was bound to come.

It was the second time that day that Rachel had shocked everyone.

"What?" Mr Schue shook his head in disbelief. He couldn't understand how history kept on repeating itself with Glee club. He silently thanked God for the fact that he didn't have a pregnant teenager on his hands again. "Are you leaving Glee club? Again?"

"Yes. And this time it's not because of you giving away my solos. And I'm not leaving yet. Consider this my two weeks notice. If you cannot find a twelfth member by the time regionals come around I will sing and all that but come next year I shall no longer be a part of Glee club."

"Rachel I don't understand why you're doing this." He was this close to throwing in the towel. Everytime they came close to working together well something always had to happen.

"You gave the solo away to Santana."

"Freak." Santana said rolling her eyes before sneering in Rachel's general direction. "Just because you can't keep your man-"

"Santana my personal hatred for you aside, there are other reasons why I disagree with you getting the solo. For one Mercedes lost her chance to sing 'And I am telling you I'm not going' last year so clearly she should have gotten her chance to do so this year."

"Diva say what?" Mercedes piped up, surprised that Rachel stood up for her.

"That aside you also gave the other lead vocals to Sam and Quinn. You seem to only be proving that the Cheerleaders and jocks rank higher on the hierarchy scale even within Glee."

"She actually has a point!" Artie thought out loud.

"And that's why I want out of Glee club. But I shall endeavour to fulfil the obligations I have considering the regionals are closing in fast. Even though we have no chance of winning."


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay so the story didn't quite seem finished so I guess I'm going to continue it. Unfortunately I'm more of a reader than I am a writer and again this is going to be choppy so readers beware!**

**I own nothing.**

"Okay every one, are you ready with your assignments?"Mr Schue said rubbing his hands excitedly. It was only a week ago that Rachel had dropped a bombshell on them that she wanted to leave Glee Club. Fortunately she left them with the loophole of being there until they found a new Glee club member and he planned to utilise it to the fullest. His happy demeanour faltered though when he saw Rachel's hand up in the air as usual. Softly, he let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding in."Yes, Rachel."

"While I am ready with my assignment I can't help but wonder if I should actually have to do this assignment considering that I handed in my proverbial notice?"

"Rachel we still haven't found another person for Glee so yes since this is an assignment important for our development as a team, you do have to do your assignment."

She pursed her lips but didn't really say anything else.

"Since you are ready with your assignment why don't you go first?"He said hoping to appease her by increasing her involvement.

It seemed like it was only when Rachel actually left that they realised just how much they needed her. While she wasn't very enthusiastic about working with them he was just happy she was still there. She could very well have left them hanging dry and that thought alone was enough for Will to understand just how much Rachel had grown in the last few weeks.

"I'd rather not."She said coldly and went back to the sketch book she had taken to carrying around with her.

After her break up with Finn and the other Glee members' horrible behaviour towards her, Rachel had been horribly depressed. It was disheartening to know that even among the outcasts she was an outcast. Finn had been her only friend and she had hoped to make him understand how much she really cared for him by singing that song for him at Christmas, but it had not worked. All it had done was make her see how truly alone she was and how Glee had taken over her life.

She knew she was a star and had a perfect voice that was amazing, but it had taken her a bit of fumbling to realise that she had become nothing more than a voice. Now every time people looked at her all they saw was a voice, one that hadn't even been heard at the Sectionals at that!

And vaguely she remembered a time when it wasn't all about singing. There was a time when there was no rigid schedule to put up MySpace videos and when Santana's words didn't cut so bad because there were people who would fight for her and when she didn't need a boy to make her happy. There was a time when Rachel Barbra Berry was just Rachel and not the crazy Captain of New Directions, ex girlfriend of Finn Hudson QB extraordinaire.

The thing about wake-up calls is that you never really realise how much you need them until they're dancing in front of you wearing a garbage bag and sock bunnies.

She sighed continuing to draw random faces onto the sketch pad and only when Mercedes started screeching about an unreceptive audience and glaring pointed at her that Rachel took off the earphones that were hidden beneath her hair. "Did you say something?"

Mercedes turned to Mr Schue, nostrils flaring in rage. "You see? Now what kind of teamwork are we supposed to be working on when **some** of us aren't even listening?"

"Rachel please, don't start with this now." Mr Schue pleaded when she opened her mouth to speak and she gritted her teeth.

Rachel stayed silent. She still had so much to say but considering how unwilling they were to actually listen to her she kept shut and paid attention as Mercedes belted out 'Independent women' by Destiny's child because she was in her words 'an independent sistah'.

One after the other all of the Glee club members sang.

Santana, with her eyes trained on Rachel's figure a smirk on her face crooned 'Like me.' By Girlicious ("_You know it's true.")_

Finn broke into a heartbreaking rendition of "This love" by Maroon 5_. ("Glee was always the one place where I could really let loose so here it is.")_

"Rachel would you like to go next?"

Throughout Finn's song every member shot glares at Rachel except for Puck who kept eyes off of either of the two. As if Finn was the only one who had his heart broken.

As soon as she got onto the stage, Quinn and Santana scoffed and turned to their phones presumably texting each other .No matter how badly Santana had behaved with Quinn at the start of the year, it seemed like their mutual dislike for Rachel brought them back together.

Ignoring them Rachel took a deep breath. For some reason she actually felt nervous being on this stage. It didn't feel like home anymore.

"This is the song Dad sang for me when I asked him why I don't look like him."

The band struck a familiar tune but one which none of them remembered

"_I Took My Baby  
On A Saturday Bang  
Boy Is That Girl With You  
Yes We're One And The Same_

Now I Believe In Miracles  
And A Miracle  
Has Happened Tonight

But, If  
You're Thinkin'  
About My Baby  
It Don't Matter If You're  
Black Or White"

A smile lit up on her face as Rachel kicked and strutted across the stage, remembering days when her Dad twirled her and danced with her small feet on his shoes and she started to really get into the song.__

They Print My Message  
In The Saturday Sun  
I Had To Tell Them  
I Ain't Second To None

And I Told About Equality  
And It's True  
Either You're Wrong  
Or You're Right

But, If  
You're Thinkin'  
About My Baby  
It Don't Matter If You're  
Black Or White"

She ended with a high kick and praised her stars that she had the foresight to wear jeans that day.

It felt good. It felt so _good_ to focus on memories that were wonderful and loving and _true_ and would always stay that way.

So she smiled even if at an unappreciative audience. Because whether or not they accepted that she was the star of New Directions she was still a star. And she didn't need them to prove it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Yeah, I can honestly and utterly say I did not expect this much feedback. Thanks for all the reviews and alerts!**

**I still own nothing.**

It was a beautiful day outside. Light grey clouds were edging the horizon and a soft breeze filled the school. And as Rachel stared out the window she wished she was out there instead of waiting for her advanced Calculus teacher.

"Rachel I'm sorry to ask you this but would you tutor Dave Karofsky?"

"What?"

"All the others have declined. David is a smart student but calculus goes over his head. He needs a tutor and everyone else is too scared to teach him. I know you'll probably decline but I have to ask."

"You want me to tutor Dave Karofsky." The guy who had been throwing slushies in her face since what felt like the beginning of time Dave Karofsky? The one who frightened Kurt to the point of transferring to a new school Dave Karofsky?

"Okay."

Her teacher heaved a sigh of relief and suggested Rachel have someone chaperone her sessions just in case. Neither of them wanted to think about what 'just in case' she was talking of. And so it was that two hours later, she found herself in the local library sitting in front of the boy who had made her life hell and more for the past years.

She shot him a tentative smile, confused by the strange face he was making. It seemed like a cross between shock and awe and anger all at once.

"So what part exactly are you having problems with?"

"You are going to tutor me."

"Well yes, my academic standing allows me to-"

"_Why?"_

"Because apparently you're horrible at calculus. And I'm not. Surely the line of thought is not that difficult to follow?"

"That's not what I meant!"

"I'm sorry, did I not answer your question correctly? You did ask why I am tutoring you and I did answer. Hn maybe you didn't ask the right question then."

He looked up from where he had buried his head in his hands once she started talking. Rachel Berry wasn't just targeted for being the daughter of the most prolific gay couple in Lima but also because she just wouldn't _shut up_. But sometimes in those long diatribes she wound up making a point.

"Okay then why didn't you refuse to tutor me when you had good reason to?"

"Excellent work framing the question David! I can see you don't need tutoring in Language arts. And I agreed to tutor you because ...and you have to promise not to get mad at me for this though?"He rolled his eyes and nodded."Well because I kind of felt sorry for you."

"Sorry? For _me_? _You're _the one that everyone hates, not me Man-hands."

"If you say so." She said smiling in a sickening sweet way, reminiscent of the way a mother smiled when indulging her child. He frowned wondering if Kurt had told her about what had happened in that locker room. "So what part of the calculus sums do you find most difficult? I went through some of your work and-"

"It was Hummel wasn't it! I am going to kill that bitch!" He got up and halfway through the door, storming off in a dramatic fashion that even Rachel was jealous of. Where did she get off, feeling sorry for him?

"It wasn't Kurt."Her words stopped him in his tracks and he turned back. "It wasn't anyone. I didn't even realise until I saw your notes. Your X's are very distinct. You wrote them the same way on the gifts you donated.

You're a good person. I don't know why you're so afraid to be who you really are."

He snorted and turned to her. "Be who I really am? Berry, have you seen the way they treat you? Every single day you get slushies thrown in your face, your own boyfriend wouldn't stand up for you and your precious Glee club hates you. All for what? Because you come in everyday like yourself. As if you aren't afraid of them hating you, like it means nothing that you get thrown into dumpsters and pushed around, hated for being yourself.

This is High School not some Broadway show where everyone accepts you for who you are. You have to fit the mould or they break you._ This_ is real life."

She continued to smile magnanimously and something in him just snapped. He sat down next to her and slumped over in his chair.

"How do you do it? How do you take all the abuse and still come back the next day? How do you not hate yourself for being so different?" He asked her though it sounded more like he was asking himself.

"Did you watch the news yesterday? A teenage boy in Columbus died from a car accident. He was hit by a drunk driver who lost control of his truck. He was sixteen years old. Same as us." She took a deep breath and steeled herself before saying the next words. "Life's too short to spend it pretending to be someone else. Even if only for a day."

They sat in silence then, the bully and the bullied. In the eyes of all the people in school he was the strong and she was broken. But in that moment, in that haven surrounded by walls of book the sworn enemies bared their souls to each other as only they could.


	4. Chapter 4

**It's Mr. Schue's turn.**

**I still own nothing.**

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"So Mr Schue, when are you holding auditions?" Just as Will Schuester was exiting his last class of the day before heading over to the choir room, Rachel came out of nowhere. He just barely stopped himself from dropping the books he was holding and letting out a shriek that would have sounded undoubtedly girlish.

"Auditions?"

"Yes auditions. To replace me. You do remember when I told you two weeks ago that I don't want to be a part of Glee Club anymore, don't you?"

He sighed. It seemed like a frequent occurrence around Rachel.

"Rachel it just seems pointless. In the very beginning of the year we put on a stellar performance of New York and yet no one signed up for Glee Club. The only person who did audition was run off by you."

"I would like to point out that the new VA coach was the one who did the stealing. The fact that she actually came for auditions proved that she was willing to be a part of New Directions and had it not been for the fact that Vocal Adrenaline was offering her something which would have made life incredibly easy on her she would not have chosen to leave WMHS."

"Yes well still. Sam didn't join until he was injured and even after that it was Quinn's presence that kept him here. And Lauren was a last minute addition in return for Puck! Do you see the dilemma auditions pose?"

"Yes I do. I understand that the chances of finding a new member are very hard. But last year when we were a member short we accepted Jacob Ben Israel for our team. Jacob Ben Israel. More importantly holding auditions shows that you are respecting my decision. Considering how much I have tolerated your high handedness when it comes to my singing, there are some cases where I draw the line."

"I hardly think high handed is the way to describe how we deal with you."

"No but it's the nicest way I could find a way to tell you that you suck."

A hurt expression flitted across the Spanish teacher's face before he pursed his lips in consternation. In that moment Rachel could not believe how appropriate Sue Sylvester's descriptions of Mr Schue really were.

"Mr Schue you let your personal problems affect Glee, you really don't have the appropriate training to be a Glee director, and you're so busy trying to make friends with your students you fail to see what really matters. I mean you planted drugs on Finn to force him into joining Glee in the first place. Granted he ended up actually willing to be a part of Glee club but still, your moral compass does not exactly point North right now."

Flabbergasted Will just stood there with his mouth wide open while Rachel waited for a response. Finally fed up she sighed (he seemed to be rubbing off on her) and started taping her toe impatiently hoping the sound would snap him out of it. He closed his mouth and spluttered a bit and she realised she'd have to do all the talking herself.

"I'm just asking you to hold auditions Mr Schue nothing more nothing less. If someone tries out and is a decent enough singer, then I can finally leave without the demise of New Directions on my conscience."

She turned on her heel and left.

And so it was that quite unintentionally Rachel Barbra Berry achieved her most dramatic exit ever.


	5. Chapter 5

**It's been a bit of a while hasn't it? Well I hope this chapter answers why Rachel doesn't just quit Glee and gives a bit more of an insight into how she sees the other Glee members and herself as well.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Glee**

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Rachel didn't go to the mall often. The only times she went there were with Finn on their dates to the bowling alley. She didn't know why he kept on dragging her there, honestly his obsession with it was frightening her now that she didn't have to keep on making excuses for his behaviour any more. And that was yet another point against him.

That list was growing very, very long.

"Why am I here again?"She asked herself sinking her face into her palms. She was sitting in a food court where she couldn't eat anything (the woes of being a vegan), all alone surrounded by a million people only to find her parents an Anniversary present.

A loud group of people neared the area and when a familiar laugh rang out, she turned to see who it was.

It was her _precious_ Glee club complete with a shiny Finn and Santana walking by laughing completely unaware of their female co- captain watching them. Even Lauren was there although all she was doing was raping Puck with her eyes. Oh if there was ever a time when Rachel Barbra Berry wanted to curse people with eternal misfortune that was it.

Because seriously? Everyone was there and they didn't even bother asking her if she wanted to join them? Seriously?

But as the anger and rage boiled within her she couldn't help but pity them.

Rachel was a lot of things but a hypocrite was not one of them. She was not blind to her many faults and accepted them as a part of who she was. And she never pretended to be anyone else. Yes she was a diva and yes for all her confidence she still needed validation from others. She was bitter at times and easily jealous but she didn't pretend not to be. She may not be the most pleasant of people but she was well aware of exactly what kind of a person she was.

But those Glee kids that became a dysfunctional family and preached acceptance of everyone, were the very ones who weren't capable of it. They didn't seem to realise that by excluding her to such an extent and by accepting Finn and Santana without question for what sins they had committed, they were no better than the bullies that they claimed tormented them every day.

They saw themselves through rose tinted glasses. And one day those glasses would break and so would that perfect picture they had painted of themselves.

But then she saw Kurt with them and the anger grew again. Because after what Kurt had gone through and how close they'd become in the aftermath of his bullying and the consequent transfer, she thought that they were at least in the process of becoming friends if not already at that point.

She thought of going up to them and giving them a piece of her mind but decided against it. It wouldn't make any difference to them and it would be more fun (and easier) to watch them squirm a bit. With that in mind she dialled Kurt's number making sure to keep an eye on them while being out of sight herself.

She saw his face smile just that bit more when he heard Defying Gravity, their personal ringtone for each other ring out and grew a bit confused. Wasn't he supposed to be annoyed that the diva was calling him when he was out with the other gleeks?

"Hey there Divalicious!" Her confusion only grew as she saw him blatantly admitting in the other glee kid's presence that he was talking to her. Did he honestly have no idea what had happened in the past weeks? Was he actually unaware of how she was being ostracized by their 'friends'?

"Hello Kurt I was just wondering what you were doing today and if maybe you'd be able to help me with shopping for my parents? It's their anniversary and I have no idea what to get them!" From where she was, she could see him frown a bit while the others stiffened as they realised whom he was talking to.

"But I thought you weren't feeling that well? Isn't that why you aren't here with us?" She saw him throw a confused look at Mercedes who didn't even bother even meeting his eyes at this point.

She laughed in a seemingly genuine manner, all the while thanking her acting coach silently in her mind. "Where did you hear that? I'm absolutely in perfect health. Actually I'm just in the mall right now and-oh hey there you are! I didn't see you there before!" She said pretending to have just noticed that they were all there and waved to him (and the rest) with a wide albeit fake smile on her face.

He shot them a disgusted look and went over to Rachel who had gotten up from her seat and hugged her a bit before sitting down next to her. From over his shoulder she saw them clearly avoiding looking at her .Most of them shuffled their feet while Santana glared and Quinn rolled her eyes at her. Finn kept on looking at her and then ducking his head awkwardly.

As hurt as Rachel was, she was still smug at being able to make them uncomfortable like that. On some level though she was just amazed she had any sort of influence on them at all.

"I am so sorry Rachel, I had no idea-" He sounded so sincere that Rachel's fake smile turned real as she waved it off .It was the first time somebody had apologised to her and that realisation almost brought her to tears. Because she deserved an apology but not from Kurt and this was probably as close as she was going to get to it.

"It's okay Kurt. This is not the first time I've been snubbed and probably won't be the last time either. I've gotten used to it actually. Before it made me a bit mad but then..."She trailed off and Kurt who hadn't stopped feeling horrible for what had just happened prompted her to continue.

"They're just kids Kurt. They don't realise that their actions have consequences. They're afraid and this is the world they live in and they're trying to fit in _so hard_. I don't blame them for what they're doing honestly, I just wish they'd see the hypocrisy of it all. I don't care as much about their behaviour much as their inability to own up to it." She gave him a small, sad smile. "I don't really have any right to talk about it though. I noticed you all quite a while ago. I just called you up to see your reaction. You're the most honest person I know and the fact that you hadn't told me to my face that you just barely tolerate me too was ...disconcerting to say the least."

"Rachel, I don't know what to say! I just didn't realise it was this bad!"

"Don't even think about it, it's fine really. Now any ideas for an anniversary present to get for the best Dads in the world?" She said jokingly hoping to distract him.

"I can't believe you're still in Glee after all this!"He said incredulously before verifying that. "You are still in Glee right?"

Seeing that her attempts to distract him weren't working she sighed. "Yes I am still in Glee. I told them that if they find a replacement then I am out of there but since they need twelve members I'm still in Glee. Not that they have actually been looking or holding auditions or anything." She added as an afterthought.

"Why don't you just quit?" Kurt knew he had left Glee club in lurch as well when he left but he never felt any guilt about it and he was sure Rachel wouldn't either.

"Well in essence I have. Unless my presence is absolutely necessary I do not attend Glee practices and Mr Schue's team-building exercises are non-existent for me really, but I just don't want to leave any strings attached you know? I don't want them to hold it over my head, telling me I took the coward's way out, quitting just because I didn't get solos. It has to be a clean cut no uneven edges left. When I leave Glee I want there to be no way in hell that they can guilt me into coming back!"There was a determined light in her eyes that told Kurt that she was not going to be convinced otherwise.

"I just can't believe Finn never told me this! Why didn't he stick up for you? And for that matter why isn't he here now?"

Rachel just stared at him in disbelief.

"You have really been out of the loop haven't you?"

"Start from the beginning and don't leave anything out."

"Help me find a present and it's a deal."

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**Review?**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot and any OCs you see.**

Rachel leaned against her locker with a sigh. Yet another day gone by and the auditions signup sheet on the Notice Board was still left blank. Not even Jacob-Ben Israel was ready to join Glee once he learned that they were to replace her since the only reason he would join Glee was to 'get in her pants'. At this rate she'd never manage to be rid herself of Glee. She knew that Glee was on the bottom of the social ladder and the Auditions at the beginning of the year had all but proved that but she still harboured the tiniest of hopes.

"Why so serious? Let's put a smile on that face!" Seth, the guy with the locker next to her said jokingly while taking his books out of the locker. Having transferred at the beginning of the year he seemed to be unaware that associating with Rachel Berry was social suicide. It had resulted in what was the closest thing Rachel had come to a friend that wasn't in fact associated with Glee. Not that Glee had given her many friends to begin with. Still it was nice having small conversations about nothing important in the morning.

"Hello Seth."She said giving him a tired smile. Only to get an intrigued look from him in return.

"What's got you all out of sorts, milady?"She smiled a bit wider at his old world expression.

"Oh nothing, just wish someone would audition that's all."

"Audition?"

"For the Glee club. I sort of promised not to leave New Directions until they find a replacement."

"What's Glee club? What's New Directions?" He looked genuinely confused while she continued to look at him with an incredulous expression. Because Glee might be hated, but it was _definitely_ not invisible.

"It's the school's show choir. Didn't you catch our Toxic performance at the beginning of the year? It was in front of the whole school for an assembly."

"Yeah after that first assembly with the sex education film I have not attended a single one of _those._" Both shuddered at the memory before walking towards the doors together. "So they sing right? In this Glee club?"

"Pretty much."

"But you like singing right? You're always going on about Streisand and all that, so why do you want to quit?"

"Long story short everyone there hates me and I got sick of putting up with it. But I don't want them to guilt me into joining the club again so I won't be quitting until someone else joins Glee which seems like it will never happen so..."

"I could audition." He said with a shrug.

She stopped in her tracks. "Seriously?"

"Yeah sure. I've always wanted to rescue a damsel in distress." A little dimple peeked out at the edge of his smile.

"You should know that if you're in Glee you're almost certified to be bullied."

He snorted and smirked. "Seriously? Those jocks were beat by Arlington last week and Arlington didn't even _have_ a football team until two weeks ago. Those morons couldn't touch me with a fifty foot pole."

"I could kiss you right now." Rachel said point blank. Because this might have been the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her.

"Well I'm not stopping you! Go on plant one on me. In fact," He leaned in closer with a smirk on his face," I dare you to!" He said, smiling even further as she laughed .It wasn't until she did laugh that she realised it had been a really long time since she had. "So I just go to the auditorium right? And sing something?"

"Yes. Oh I know I could help you with your song selection! I know just the song –"

"_Please_ don't make me sing something from that Happy Girl movie that you talk about all the time."

"It's Funny Girl!"

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"Someone's actually auditioning?" Mr Schue couldn't hide his shock. Neither could any of the other Glee members.

"Who is this Seth guy anyway? Never heard of him." Santana said from where she was perched on the arm of a chair in Finn's general vicinity.

"He's in my AP Biology class actually. Just transferred this year."Artie said.

"Oh is he the guy with the professor parents? I think he lives on my block." Tina chimed in. The two were slowly getting back to a state of friendship after bonding over dating one of the 'Populars'. "Williams right?"

"Yep." Mr Schue said going over the one name on the otherwise blank sheet over and over again as if it was that hard to believe.

"Shouldn't he like, be here by now?" Santana said, filing her nails. Rachel was beginning to wonder how she had any left considering that she was always filing them.

"He said he had to meet one of his teachers concerning some assignment but that he should be here in some time." A silence descended upon them as they turned to the resident Diva who hadn't really spoken a word to them in weeks. Not since the run-in at the mall.

"You know him?" Finn said with a jealous edge to his voice. She rolled her eyes because Finn had no right to be jealous. Then again he had no right to still be talking to her either but there he was.

"Yes." That said she went back to the book she was reading.

"Sorry I'm late." Even though he'd assured Rachel a million times that he'd show up she was still surprised to see him there. He slung his bag off onto one of the empty seats and went onto the stage, grabbing a guitar from the ones on the rack near the curtains.

He had stage presence she had to give him that. He stood all alone on that stage and it didn't seem unnatural to him at all.

He walked to the centre of the stage and adjusted the microphone to his height .The ease with which he conducted himself seemed to garner the interests of all the Glee members who hadn't really expected someone who could actually perform, just someone to fill in the twelve members quota.

"This is Pardon me by Incubus." He announced and went straight to the song, strumming the guitar with expertise.

"_Pardon me while I burst  
Pardon me while I burst_

A decade ago, I never thought I would be.  
At twenty three on the verge of spontaneous combustion. Woe-is-me  
But I guess that it comes with the territory.  
Anonymous landscape of never-ending calamity.  
I need you to hear. I need you to see.  
That I have had all I can take  
And exploding seems like a definite possibility  
To me

So Pardon me while I burst into flames.  
I've had enough of the world, and its people's mindless games  
So Pardon me while I burn, and rise above the flame  
Pardon me, pardon me. Don't never be the same.

Not two days ago I was having a look in a book  
And I saw a picture of a guy fried up above his knees  
I said I can relate  
Cause lately I've been thinking of combustication as a welcomed vacation from.  
The burdens of the planet earth, like gravity, hypocrisy, and the perils of being in 3-D  
And thinking so much differently.

So Pardon me while I burst into flames.  
I've had enough of the world, and it's people's mindless games  
Pardon me while I burn, and rise above the flame  
Pardon me, pardon me. Don't never be the same.  
Never be the same...yeah.  
Pardon me while I burst into flames.  
Pardon me, pardon me, pardon me.  
So pardon me while I burst into flames.  
I've had enough of the world, and it's people's mindless games  
So pardon me while I burn, and rise above the flame  
Pardon me, pardon me. I'll never be the same.  
Pardon me, never be the same. Yeah"

"Whoa." The word escaped Artie's mouth but was on everyone's mind. Even Rachel was surprised because she hadn't ever heard him sing. She didn't expect him to be _good_! Passable maybe, but not actually good!

"Well." Mr Schue said once he collected his jaw from where it scraped the floor. "Welcome to Glee Club."

Inside her mind Rachel went wild. She felt like she could finally breathe.

She was free.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Well hello there! I haven't updated in a long time I know but I found it difficult to think in terms of an AU where Rachel wasn't in New Directions when the canon was being updated every week,but I wanted to try writing a bit more of Karofsky and Rachel interaction so here it is even though it isn't very good! **

In the silence of the library, Rachel Berry and Dave Karofsky sat across each other, the former boring holes into his skin with her stare while the latter ignored her blatantly.

"So I hear you slushied Artie."

"Hm."

"And your coach made you join Glee."

"Hm."

"You also made comments with intention to question Noah's sexuality and his masculinity causing an altercation between Glee club and the Football team. And then after going to rehearsals and a wonderful performance you all quit the Football team simply because of a slushy and now the girls of Glee club and Seth are joining the Football team so as to allow the team to compete in the upcoming match with the minimum number of members required."

At this point Dave who had been ignoring her in hopes of getting her to drop the subject looked up at her with a mixture of surprise and exasperation."How do you know all that? Didn't you quit the Glee Club?"

"I check Jacob Ben-Israel's blog on a regular basis so I know if I need to take out a restraining order again."

He mouthed the word again before holding out his hands as if to show that he didn't really want to know. Which was understandable really because when Jacob Ben-Israel came into the picture even the football players were creeped out by the boy's stalker-ish behaviour.

"Okay so all that happened, so what?"

An odd noise escaped Rachel's mouth as her eyebrows pulled together in exasperation. She thought they were making progress. And really they were, Dave hadn't been slushying half as many people since their talk and there had been an almost noticeable lack of people in the dumpsters (although Jacob remained a fixture in them).

"So I thought things were getting better. You were getting closer to achieving self-actualization albeit with still a long way to go and now you're back at the beginning. Do you even realise that you are returning to the modus operandi that got you to have a near breakdown in the library with me as witness?"

Throughout her stern speech he had been shifting more and more in his seat and as she finished her sentence he slammed his hands down on the library table in anger tuning to her with a look on his face that nearly scared Rachel.

"Look the hockey team slushied us all right. What were we supposed to do just sit back and take that?"

"The Glee Club sits back and takes it. Do you know why? It's because they believe in doing what they love regardless of what everyone else thinks."

"Because that has clearly worked out for them."He said sarcastically. She opened her mouth to retort but he interrupted her saying," You know if you're trying to show a football team that you're more than a bunch of pussies singing sappy songs at the drop of the hat then singing "Need you now" is not the way to go."

Having no response to that Rachel proceeded to splutter for a few minutes before settling for a glare which had no effect on him whatsoever.

With a pointed look he turned back to the text he was flipping through with a frown.

"It's not that you know. It's not singing at the drop of a hat. It takes a lot of practice and a lot of hard work to achieve the level of perfection that New Directions strives for. If they sing a sappy song it's because the sappy song is the one they've been practicing."

"Why do you care? You're not even a part of it anymore and it's done great things for you. Did you know you were the one we were going to slushy the way we did him? But since you left your precious New Directions your status is higher and so we slushied the wheelchair kid instead."

"I care because you're ostracizing people for _singing_! Singing, David! This is music we're talking about, it's everything, this is where people find their God because that's what music is. It's _everything_ and it's for the soul and you're _stifling_ it."

A few moments' silence followed where Rachel actually believed he had understood what she was trying to say, but before the feeling could take over her mind he opened his mouth and ruined everything.

"I don't care what you say, if this Glee Club is a reason for me to be slushied, then there is no way I am ever going to be a part of it."That said he picked up his books and left the library.

.

.

.

It was half time and she could hear the joy in Kurt's voice as he shared that he was informed via text of the reconciliation between the football team and the Glee club barring one David Karofsky. She knew what she had to do then and under the pretence of going to the loo made her way to the boy's locker room where she found Dave alone sitting on a bench, a frown on his face.

"Get up! You're going to play football and you're going to sing and dance to Thriller, albeit not in that sequence."

"I'm not going to -"he was interrupted as Rachel took his arm and dragged him outside to see New Directions start their mash up. He heard the roar of the audience and the looks on the faces of the performers, even his usual partners in slushying seemed to be enjoying themselves. It was all the push he needed, taking a deep breath he walked out and joined them on the field.

Away in the bleachers an amazed Kurt and Rachel were grinning and screaming their approval and Dave knowing that tomorrow everything would be back to normal, couldn't help but wish it wasn't just a once in a lifetime thing.


End file.
